Unlearning Urgency: A Summer Practice for Mental Health

By Sylvia J. Jones

It’s summer. The sun stays out longer. The days feel wider. But for so many of us, our minds haven’t gotten the memo.

We’re still rushing. Still waking up with to-do lists already barking. Still measuring our worth in output, our rest in guilt, and our peace in productivity.

Let’s talk about it.

Because for many of us, especially Black women, first-gen trailblazers, caregivers, or cycle-breakers, urgency isn’t just a bad habit. It’s a trauma response.

What is Urgency, Really?

Urgency, in its unhealthy form, isn’t the same as momentum or purpose. It’s that tightness in your chest when you’re not doing enough. That anxiety that says, “If I rest, everything will fall apart.”

It’s not just about deadlines. It’s about survival.

Many of us were raised in environments, homes, schools, and systems where urgency was necessary. We had to be two steps ahead, prove ourselves twice as much, or keep moving to stay emotionally or physically safe.

Over time, that hustle hardwires itself in the body. It becomes the baseline.

But here’s the truth: Urgency is not your personality. It’s a protective pattern. And you’re allowed to outgrow it.

Why Summer is the Season to Practice Slowing Down

Nature teaches what capitalism tries to make us forget: everything has a rhythm.

Summer is the Earth’s inhale. It’s the season of ripening. Of warmth, pleasure, and presence.

And yet here we are, burned out in August. Fighting the heat instead of flowing with it and hustling through healing.

But what if summer was a portal? What if we used this season to unlearn urgency, not just intellectually, but in the body?

What if we let ourselves feel safe while doing less?

Unlearning Urgency: Practices Rooted in Compassion

This is not about adding five more things to your self-care checklist. It’s about returning to your breath. Your body. Your inner knowing.

Here are 5 gentle practices you can begin this summer:

1. 

Name the Pattern, Not the Shame

When you catch yourself rushing or spiraling, try saying:

👉🏾 “This is urgency speaking. It’s not truth. It’s a pattern.”

Naming gives you power. It allows you to respond with curiosity instead of criticism.

2. 

Create Sacred Pauses

Pick one part of your day to slow down on purpose. Morning coffee. Your evening shower. A 10-minute sit outside. Let that moment be enough.

Stillness is not wasted time. It’s medicine.

3. 

Make Room for Guilt, and Don’t Let It Drive

When guilt shows up, greet it like a visitor, not a verdict. Try this affirmation:

👉🏾 “I feel guilty, but I’m still choosing rest.”

The goal isn’t to never feel guilt. It’s not to let guilt make your choices.

4. 

Practice Saying, “I’ll Get Back to You.”

You don’t have to answer every text, DM, or email immediately. Give yourself the grace to respond when your spirit says yes, not when your anxiety says hurry.

This tiny boundary is a radical act of self-trust.

5. 

Replace “What’s Next?” With “What’s Needed?”

Urgency asks, “What’s next?”

Compassion asks, “What’s needed?”

Start your days by tuning in:

🌀 What does my body need today?

🌀 What’s most aligned, not just most urgent?

A Final Word: You Deserve a Life That Feels Like Breathing

The systems around us, grind culture, generational pressure, systemic inequality, teach us that our value is earned through exhaustion. But the truth is, your worth is not a wage. Your value is not your velocity.

This summer, let your healing be slow. Let it be sacred. Let it be enough.

Because urgency may have helped you survive, but it can’t help you thrive.

And you? You were made for more than survival.